![]() I still struggle with talking about my sexuality in therapy because of how much shame and stigma I felt after coming out. After having all three of those weaponized against me, attempting to undo that harm has been a years-long process. ‘Christian counseling’ was not an experience that made me any less gay, but it certainly further eroded my faith in therapy, family, and religion. Though I stopped going after a few sessions, it was still enough to do quite a bit of psychological damage. I didn’t want to go, to begin with, but I was afraid that if I didn’t that I would be disowned. Essentially, I was told that I thought I was gay because of my strained relationship with my father and that I could live a ‘normal’ life if I just prayed enough and deferred to my mom. ![]() This took place with a counselor my mom had known for years who had bought into her narratives of what was going on. For someone like myself, who comes from an abusive family of origin as well as a strict religious community, this process was especially complicated.Īfter I came out to my mom at 18, she had me attend ‘Christian counseling’ – what I describe as conversion therapy lite. Like many others in the LGBTQ community, coming out was a painful and difficult experience.
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